Swinging At Home|
It is normal to be very nervous having your first swing experience at an adult club or at home. Some couples feel intimidated by the idea of going to an adult club for their first experience and will place ads in swing magazines, internet ads, telepersonals, etc. and will arrange a meeting with a potential person or couple at home. Some of these first time experiences go very well, but many of them end in a terrible evening for many different reasons.
We wish we would have known about the adult clubs much earlier in our swing experiences. We highly recommend adult clubs as a first meeting or swing experience in the lifestyle for the following reasons, safety in numbers, no pressure atmosphere, social erotic atmosphere, neutral location, experienced advisors, family & neighbors won't drop in, phones won't ring for the kids, someone else is changing CD's and many more.
When you and your partner have decided to meet a new couple and exchange partners for a full swap or your first swing experience at home, here are some helpful hints that will make the evening a huge success, or at least more enjoyable and safe. First and foremost, screen your couples thoroughly!!!! Get to know as much about them, before you play. It is best to meet a new couple socially away from your home, before you get together privately. Make sure the four of you get along and that there is an attraction for ALL players, not just three (hoping the fourth one will fall into place). Meeting couples at an adult club first is highly recommended. Even better if you meet these couples in action at an on-premise club.
LOCATION - LOCATION - LOCATION
Not every location is perfect for your first swing experience! Remember the saying in business, that the location can make or break any business. The same holds true in swinging, so take time to find the right club or location. Find a cozy spot in the house to meet. Remove any coffee tables. Do not sit at any table, especially the kitchen table. Any physical object that is in-between you and the other couple, tends to make it much harder to get cozy and intimate. If you don't remove these objects, it will turn into a social evening and not an intimate one. If you only want and have agreed to a social evening, make sure the tables are used.
Prepare the designated play area for sexual play or intercourse. If your designated area is the bedroom, fresh sheets and a good clean up and coloured red lights are a must. If your designated area is the same as your meeting or social area, be sure to have pillows or a pull out bed or mattress near by. Don't forget condoms, kleenex, garbage cans, soap, towels, etc.
LIGHTS, MUSIC, ACTION!
You don't want your children or neighbors to see 100% of the action (or maybe you do), so use coloured lights, preferably red and the lighting low and intimate, scented candles are a nice touch. To help make your evening a success, you will want to have some soft slow music playing, some XXX movies playing with no sound or low volume. You will find differences of opinions about the XXX movies playing, we find that if your evening is social OR sexual, the movies keep you focused on the topic of sex and the social conversations will get into what everyone likes or does not like sexually.
If you have children at home, it is a must that you have them sleep over with friends or family so that your evening is free of distractions or embarrassments. Many couples are not able to entertain for many different reasons, living with older family members, neighbors that always drop in and many other very good reasons.
Taking a shower and cleaning up before company arrives is a must. This is just like dating, you have to be at your best. Good grooming is a winner every time. Condoms and tissue should be near by and visible. Don't forget to brush your teeth, mouthwash, deodorant, shave, cologne or perfume and brush your hair. If your nails are rough, don't forget to clean and trim them.
Never sit beside your partner if you want the evening to get hot and intimate, you must provide space so that your guests can get comfortable with each of you. Be friendly and honest. If you are nervous, say so, the other couple is probably nervous too and talking about it helps break the ice. Talk about the swinging lifestyle and fantasies, stay away from topics about work or your children. Most couples have a difficult time making the first move. The more open and comfortable the two of you are, will make your invited friends feel relaxed and aroused to play. Extra cushions, pillows, blankets should be readily available.
Wear clothes that are sexy and easily removed. Invite your friends to bring something similar and sexy to wear. Your friends can change at your house if the mood is right. Wear layers of different clothing, this way you can take off what feels comfortable as the evening goes on.
If your invited guests never see the revealing outfit you were wearing underneath, at least your partner will get their chance when company has left.
Leave your inhibitions at home or in the closet. It can be fun to try different things or people. Swingers cum in all different sizes, shapes, ages, colours, religions and every person is different in the way they will play with you.
We have met many wonderful couples in this lifestyle in every age, colour, size etc. you can think of. It can be fun playing with a playmate that is younger, older, taller, shorter, etc.. When you are both open to try different things freely in the lifestyle you will both have a lot of fun.
Many couples first start in the lifestyle with a shopping list of requirements that a couple must meet before they play with them. It is very important that you feel comfortable with the people you play with, all we would like to point out is that if your list is too big, no couple will be able to meet all your requirements. Some couples look for the perfect 10 in looks age and body figure, just to find out that the matches are very few and the experiences were not a 10. Most couples will find much more fun in the lifestyle when they experiment outside of normal or the perfect 10.
We have been with very young couples, we would swear have been swinging for 10 years or more and some older couples have really made us hot! There must be something that clicks or turns you on when you meet new potential couples. There is no secret here, you will feel an attraction or you will not. Some people can look across a room and have you wet in your pants for them. Sometimes we will experiment with a person that is totally opposite what our partner is like to experience something totally different and erotic at the same time. Some people can play soft and cuddly, while others will hold you down and wham, bam, thank you mam! Variety is the spice of life and especially swinging!
It's For The Kids
Keep other distractions turned off, such as the ringer on the telephone, beeper and cell phones. These are all little things, but when you are trying to make the evening erotic, these small distractions can sometimes destroy the whole mood of the evening.
We had several couples get together at a private home for an erotic evening of hot sex. Their neighbors saw all the cars in their driveway and on the street, so they popped over to see what was going on. The neighbors were not in the lifestyle, but were good friends with the hosts and would not leave. The party never got off the ground and everyone finally gave up near midnight. Their neighbors told them that they enjoyed meeting all the couples and thought we were all nice outgoing people. They were even looking forward to the next get together! Little do they know that they helped destroy the entire swing party that was planned for that evening.
Keep The Evening HOT!
Keep the house hot or warm enough that you will not get a chill from taking your clothes off. If the temperature is too cold or the air conditioning is turned up too high, most couples are not interested in catching a cold to play sexually.
If couples mention is is a bit warm in the room, all the reason to bring up the subject of letting the ladies change into something more revealing or comfortable. Most ladies will be happy to fill the request.
Don't just talk, get up as a foursome and dance to the slow music! Dance very close, start fondling, kissing, masturbating, revealing body parts. This is the quickest way to get the sexual interaction going!!!! Move to your designated sexual play area and have fun.